


The Memories We Make

by RVTstudent



Series: Finding Family [2]
Category: Mass Effect - All Media Types, Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Angst, Biotics (Mass Effect), Character Death, Divorce, F/M, Fighter Pilots, Getting Together, Intersex, M/M, Motherhood, One Shot, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Side Story, Tuchanka (Mass Effect), Turians
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-20
Updated: 2018-05-26
Packaged: 2019-04-25 10:11:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 11,394
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14376588
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RVTstudent/pseuds/RVTstudent
Summary: “With the memories we make. We fill the spaces we live in with them.” – Mike Franks (Muse Watson), NCISA companion piece to my first fic “You Do What You Have To For Family” featuring random one-shots and vignettes starring the characters I wanted to expand on. Will be updated as inspiration strikes.Artwork on Chapter 2!Feel free to leave questions/asks/comments about my OC's or tell me about yours!





	1. Baby Food

“Mmm, mmm, mmm. No, Caius, open up.”

“ _Squawk!”_

Lara paused, shirt halfway over her head, arms akimbo in the sleeves as she finished dressing after her shower. That wasn’t a normal noise for Caius to make, especially at meal times when he was usually ravenous. _Unless_ …

 

“A good turian always follows orders you know, and you want to grow into a _big_ , _strong_ turian.”, her mate’s deep voice exaggerated.

An exasperated huff and a whine was the response he got.

“Come on, we can’t let _ima_ be right, can we? We _torvir_ have to stick together.”

 

Lara finished pulling the shirt over her head, quirking her eyebrows at the one-sided conversation she could hear filtering into the bedroom from the kitchen.

“See? It’s not so bad, even abba will try it…” a muffled gag followed. “Spirits that is _nasty_.”, Maxis cursed under his breath.

Coming around the corner, Lara saw Maxis brandishing a spoon and a jar of baby food, and she could hear his pleading undertones as he fruitlessly tried to feed Caius.

What made her chuckle, however, was the expression of her son. Mandibles pinched tightly against his chin, Caius was turning his head from side to side, arms outstretched to push away the spoon, successfully avoiding Maxis’ attempts to feed him.

When he spotted Lara, Caius stopped his evasive maneuvers and let out a happy chirp, giving Maxis an opportunity to pop the spoon into his open mouth. Maxis crowed triumphantly, readying another spoonful of food when Caius leaned forward and, “ _Bleh!_ ”.

From behind, all Lara could see was that her mate went completely still. She frowned and made her way around to Maxis’ side. When she saw his face, Lara covered her mouth with her hand, trying unsuccessfully to smother her amusement.

Blueish bits of xemna baby food ‘sludge’, as she liked to call it, oozed down Maxis’ face, dripping off his nose, chin and mandibles onto the floor.

His tone was clipped when he said, “It’s not funny Lar,”. That was when she lost it, doubling over in laughter at the petulant expression on her mate’s face before he was gagging again, some of the broth from the food having dribbled inside his mouth, and he blindly scrabbled for the damp cloth just out of his reach.

“I – I told,” she tried to get her giggles under control, “I told you he didn’t like Xemna!”


	2. Motherhood

“Another spirits cursed day of rain.” Maxis grumbled as he entered the porch of the house he and Lara were staying in on the outskirts of the city, removing his wet and muddy armor. Shaking his head and slinging droplets of cold water from his fringe, Maxis froze when he realized that the little ramshackle house, which had somehow been passed over by the Reapers, was silent. He checked the time and frowned. It was early evening and he was cold, wet and hungry, and it wasn’t like Lara not to be up and about. He knew that she had a reason for being tired lately, considering it was his choice that caused her sleepless nights and extra work.

Just a week ago, on a night similar to this one, as he was leaving the refugee camp after performing his night check on one of the last groups of turians remaining on Earth, Maxis had found a newborn fledgling, half-sodden and trilling in distress as he clung to the cowl of his mother’s chilled, unmoving body. After making arrangements for the female’s remains with some of his subordinates, Maxis brought the orphaned youngling home with him to Lara, the refugee camp’s doctor in tow.

He remembered Lara’s protests when they hadn’t been able to find any relatives among the refugees and Maxis had suggested that they take the _puer_ on as their own. Turian newborns were very vulnerable without a stable family unit around them, and orphans who were not claimed were often sickly or stunted in growth. Given the clannish nature of their species, turians were rarely truly orphaned, unlike the case with this little one. He and Lara had talked about adopting children together, but that was something they had planned for the future, not the present.

_“I don’t know anything about raising children, let alone a turian child. He would never be accepted, being raised by a couple like us, having a human for a mother. Both our governments would deny his adoption. Say we do keep him and a week or a month or a year from now the Hierarchy wants to take him from us and place him with a turian couple? He’s already lost his mother, I don’t want to give him another to lose. That’s if he even would think of me as a parent, I’m not turian.”_

Eventually he wore her down, calming most of her fears; yes Caius would be accepted as he could be painted with clan markings when he was seven, like all other turian children, as Maxis would adopt him into the Faion clan.

No, Lara being human wouldn’t be a strike against them, because rumor had it that Shepard and Vakarian were also in the process of adopting a young turian girl. They had pressured the Primarch on behalf of the very few other human-turian couples that wanted to adopt orphans in the wake of the war, and Victus wasn’t about to deny the saviors of the galaxy.

What Maxis hadn’t been able to convince Lara of, however, was that Caius did see her as his mother, regardless of species. He tried to explain that when Caius buried his head in her neck it was an instinctive response, binding himself to the scent of his parents. That when Caius rested his head on her chest, it was because her heartbeat was calming to him; and that the “chirp babble”, as Lara called it, was a greeting used by younglings for their mothers only. Despite all of his reassurances, Lara was still convinced that Caius wouldn’t see her as his mother, and Maxis was afraid that her assumptions would prevent Lara from bonding with the _puer_.

Maxis padded through the house, noting with minor concern the empty rooms he checked on his way to the bedroom to change out of his damp undersuit. The door was open just a hair, soft light spilling through the crack, and he paused, hearing quiet breathing from within. He gently pushed the door open and made his way inside. What he saw warmed his heart, the feeling spreading throughout his chilled limbs.

Lara was resting partially upright against the headboard of the bed, her arms nestled around the small bulge at her chest, and Maxis caught sight of a copper fringe peeking just below her chin, the tiny head resting over her heart. He came closer and saw that Lara had zipped Caius into her hoodie, using the thick material and her own body heat to warm the _puer_ as the temperatures outside dropped.

Maxis shucked off his damp clothing, pulling a dry undersuit from the closet, and the noise woke Caius, his turian hearing much more sensitive than Lara’s. Maxis froze, watching Caius squirm closer to Lara’s neck, grasping at her collarbone with his tiny talons for leverage. The movement roused Lara, and he watched her shift to support Caius’ new position.

As he stood there, Maxis had to clamp down on his subvocal thrum of pride and happiness, not wanting to disturb the scene in front of him, when he saw Lara angle her head to press her lips to Caius’ barely-there fringe. Stroking his back, she murmured soft and tender nothings to the youngling, who had buried his face in her neck and was purring softly, before she spotted Maxis and offered him a gentle smile.

Slipping onto the bed beside Lara, Maxis pressed his brow to her temple in gratitude, his voice husky with emotion as he whispered, “You are an amazing mother.”. For the first time, Lara didn’t deny it.

 

 

^ Lookit! Turian snugs, family cuddles! This beautiful image was commissioned from the amazing [@bethadastra-art](https://bethadastra-art.tumblr.com/). Many thanks to her for bringing my favorite chapter to life!


	3. Story Time

The bark was rough under his hands and feet as Caelan climbed the sturdy branches of the tree that grew next to the _templum_. He knew that he shouldn’t be doing this because his mother would be calling him to bed soon, but when he was this high up on the roof he could see everything and no one could find him. It was his secret place.

The sky was an inky blue, filled with an expanse of twinkling stars and the pale light of the twin moons shone brightly. He liked to sit and stare at the stars, trying to pick out which ones represented the names of the great soldiers and generals written in the tomes of annals his father showed him. Caelan liked to think that a turian’s spirit became the stars and shone every night so they could protect Palaven – even the whole galaxy! – while everyone was asleep. What he couldn’t figure out was what the two moons, Menae and Nanus, represented in the night sky.

He was startled from his puzzling by the rustling of leaves and Caelan blinked in surprise – his father had climbed the tree onto the roof!

“Your mother has been calling for you Caelan, it’s time for bed.”

“How did you know I was here?” Caelan asked in disbelief, thinking that no one could find him up there.

His father laughed, “You aren’t the only Aetrius to have climbed that tree onto the roof. I did it and your _avus_ did it before me.”

Caelan huffed – apparently his secret hiding place wasn’t so secret after all.

 “Just a few more minutes please abba?”

Indari nodded, and sat down by his son.

“Abba,” Caelan asked, “why does Palaven have two moons? You told me about the stars and the great soldiers and warriors but what are the moons?”. All Caelan really knew about them was that their light would sometimes shine in his window at night and wake him up.

“They’re Trebia’s gifts,” his father began.

“Trebia watched the ancestors fighting against one another during the great first war, killing and taking from each other without thought. Trebia was angered and hid her light away for days and days. Palaven was dark and it rained all the time.

It stayed dark for so long that the ancestors started to run out of food. Instead of fighting each other, there was a centurion who made peace between the feuding clans and they started to work together to survive. But Trebia still didn’t return as she was mourning the loss of her people, thinking they were all dead.

The centurion followed her tears up to the top of the highest mountain, above the dark, stormy clouds and told Trebia the clans had made peace with each other. As she looked down from the mountain, she saw that it was true, and her light came back and food was plentiful again. The clans were so thankful that they had the centurion carve beautiful white gems from the mountain and place them in the sky for Trebia, naming them Menae and Nanus after the two groups that made peace. They reflect Trebia’s light onto Palaven at night to remind turians that even in the darkest of times we can persevere by working together.”

“Wow.” Caelan breathed, looking wide-eyed at the two pale moons with new appreciation. Father and son sat together silently, and Caelan went to bed long after he was supposed to.

 

Dictionary

Avus – latin for grandfather

puer – latin for boy

templum – latin for temple


	4. Lost

When she stepped off the transport behind her mommy and daddy, Lara couldn’t believe her eyes. Aliens! There were pretty blue lady aliens in long dresses and there were skinny ones that had orange and green speckled skin. There were huge grey ones and even an alien that looked like a jellyfish! Lara was so excited to see all the different aliens that she let go of her mother’s skirt and wandered over to get a better look at that jelly one.

“Look mommy! He can walk instead of swimming in water!” Lara cried excitedly but her parents were nowhere to be found. She looked around and saw a few humans among the aliens, but none were her parents. “Mommy? Daddy?” she said, moving into the crowd. She couldn’t find them anywhere! She wanted to cry, but then remembered what her daddy said before they came to the City-del. “If something bad happens on our trip, look for someone in a blue and black uniform Lara. They’re Citadel Security and they are like the police here, they keep people safe.”

“Look for blue and black.” Lara whispered to herself. There! A tall alien with spikes growing out of the back of its head that reminded her of a bird she saw once in her picture book, was wearing a uniform that was blue and black. As she walked closer to the alien, Lara thought that his face kind of looked like her grey kitty Peewee! Lara hoped that Peewee didn’t miss her too much while she was away.

“’Scuse me Mr. Alien,” Lara said, reaching out on her tip-toes for the alien’s fingers – he only had three!-, “’Scuse me!”

Her voice got his attention and Lara thought his blue eyes looked like a robin’s egg as he crouched down to her level “Can I help you little one?” he asked.

“Are you a police officer? I can’t find my mommy and daddy?”

The alien nodded and showed her his badge, “I’m a C-SEC agent. What do your parents look like?”

“My mommy has yellow hair like me and she’s wearing a green dress. My daddy has brown hair and he walks funny so he has to use a cane.” Lara described.

“Well let’s see if we can find them. If not I’ll have to take you to my office.” Lara nodded in agreement and the alien picked her up and settled her against his hip. Lara wrapped her arms around his neck to hold on. He smelled like the cinna-nim-mo-nin her mommy would put in French toast! He would occasionally point to some humans, but so far they hadn’t found her parents yet.

“My name’s Lara Wells, what’s yours Mr. Alien? Do you live on the City-del?” Lara asked, studying the blue paint he had on his face.

“My name is Castis. I do live on the Citadel because I work here.” he replied, scanning the crowd.

“Do you have any kids like me?”

“I have a son Garrus, and my daughter Solana is about your age.”

“Solana…that’s a pretty name. Lana and Lara, Lara and Lana.” she began to sing-song making Castis chuckle. The deep rumble vibrated through her body and made her giggle.

“Lara! Lara Wells!” That was her daddy’s voice! “There!” Lara shouted, pointing to where her parents were pushing through the crowd.

Castis put her down and she ran towards her mommy and daddy who hugged and scolded her.

“Lara, what are you doing with that turian?” her father demanded. “He’s a police officer daddy. You told me to find someone in a blue and black suit if I needed help.” Lara didn’t understand why her daddy sounded so angry or why her mommy was glaring at Castis, who turned to leave.

“Let’s go Lara.” her mother said firmly, taking Lara’s hand.

“Wait, wait!” Lara squirmed, freeing her hand and she ran over to Castis, tugging his hand until he crouched in front of her. She hugged her arms around his neck and kissed one of his face thingies, right over the blue paint. “Thank you for finding my mommy and daddy Castis.” she said shyly. He made a funny noise and patted her head before sending Lara back to her parents.

Her mother picked her up and both of her parents began scolding her again, but Lara wasn’t listening; she was waving to Castis.


	5. Rhythm + Beat

Despite knowing that the meritocracy of the Hierarchy doesn’t care much about who their members choose to sleep, mate or bond with, Luccus has always felt a bit different. Two of his siblings, Mena and Tani, have both bonded in opposite sex couples. Even his older half-brother Caelan was in a committed relationship with a female turian from Cipritine, the last he had heard.

He can’t identify when it started – that exact moment where he found longer fringes, larger mandibles and deeper voices more attractive than the smaller, slim waisted females that vie for his attention.

Luccus knows that he’s an attractive _torvir_ , and he hasn’t lacked in bedmates since his first time in basic, but his tastes have evolved as he’s aged out of his awkward teens and into his early twenties. It’s during this time that Luccus discovers that he prefers being submissive to his bedroom partners. Given that he’s never been able to have multiple orgasms like other turian males, something he attributes to not having an emotional connection with his one-night stands or casual acquaintances, Luccus’ ability to give his lovers as much pleasure as possible before reaching his own finish just works for him. The act of submission, coupled with the thought of a commanding, _dominant_ male can spring him from his plates like nobody’s business.

A shy engineer, Luccus would meekly accept the occasional offer of a date or casual sex, but never more than once. That lesson he learned the hard way with Brutan, the only male he had ever taken to his bed multiple times. A jealously possessive cloaca that was stripped of his rank and dishonorably discharged from service after Luccus reported him to their Engineering Chief. His mistake left him shaken, going for months without blowing steam off with someone, and Luccus spent his time searching for new hobbies to unwind from his days spent working on ships in dry-dock.

A planned overhaul to the docking bays brings in a team of architects, coming back to Palaven after a stint in the outer colonies, and Luccus had been chosen to help as part of the project. Overseeing the project is an older _torvir_ , rumored to be nearing his forties, named Protis Quiso, and Luccus could listen to the man talk schematics and blueprints until they were both literally blue in the face.

He’s so distracted by Protis’ deep voice, rumbling like a rising storm, and the man’s violet gaze Luccus swears keeps sneaking glances his way, that he finds himself agreeing to _something_ that some of the group have planned for after their shift. He has to pull aside one of the other architects to find out exactly what he’s signed up for.

\---

The weight of the drum suspended from his neck feels foreign and Luccus shrugs, shifts and squirms, trying to find a comfortable position. “Stop that,” a voice behind him commands, before quieting, murmuring in Luccus’ aural canal, “Let me help.” _Protis_. Gloved talons are adjusting the strap on the drum, warm breath gently huffing onto his neck, and Luccus has to clamp down on his rumble of desire, but not before the other male hears it, earning a chuckle from his superior.

Protis explains to the small group gathered that he started a ceremonial drum group when he was stationed with the 157th Architects before the Reaper War. Now that his team has been transferred permanently to the 64th Engineering Corps, Luccus’ regiment, Protis has been looking to start up a new group again. He and the other experienced drummers had performed at the inauguration of some of the colonial Primarchs and at more than one diplomatic dinner hosted by Councilor Sparatus, as well as at Unification Day celebrations.

They start out with a demonstration by the experienced drummers who then work through some of the basic patterns with the newer members. Luccus finds it awkward at first, but with a simple adjustment of his grip on the sticks by Protis, the contact leaving Luccus flushed under his collar, he catches on quickly. Luccus can feel the tension leaving his body as he clears his mind and focuses on the rhythm, the sound of drum beats drowning out stress in his head.

The others have left the building and Luccus is just securing his new instrument in its carrying case. Picking it up to leave, he spies the long, lanky form of Protis pushing away from the wall, where unbeknownst to Luccus, the other male has spent the last few minutes ogling him. They exit together, walking side by side down the corridor.

“You show a lot of talent Luccus. With some extra practice I think you could probably be ready to perform with us for Unification Day. I can help you out if you want.” Protis’ subvocals are mainly neutral, but there are hopeful hints of offerings beyond drum tutoring there as well.

“I’ll think about it.” Luccus offers Protis a quick smile and a goodnight, increasing his pace hurriedly to get out of this uncomfortable territory he now finds himself in.

“Luccus. Luccus!” Protis calls, jogging to catch up to him, “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable, I just wanted to get to know you better. You’re good at what you do and I value your opinion about the dock overhaul. And _Spirits_ you are good looking. If I’m coming on too strong for you, I’m sorry.”

Luccus is shocked, mandibles hanging slack in surprise. Clearing his throat, in an attempt to regain some of his composure, he speaks softly, “Right now, I need a friend more than a bedmate.”

“That I can do.” Protis grins, and Luccus finds himself returning the smile.

\---

The pair make fast friends. Their coupling is a bit odd, and isn’t due to their almost twenty-year age gap. Instead, most assume they are in a sexual relationship, whereas the opposite is true. They aren’t sleeping together, but they aren’t finding comfort in another either. This goes on for months, and then a year passes. Protis would gently prod Luccus occasionally, testing his receptiveness to the idea of sleeping together. Time and Protis’ devotion is healing the trauma left behind by Brutan, and Luccus finds himself warming to the idea.

\---

He’s had trouble learning the difficult two-person drum rhythm for an old war hymn their group has been practicing, and Protis suggests that they take a break from learning it. The solo isn’t mentioned again until after an interaction between them, two weeks later.

Their first night together isn’t what Luccus expects. The gear Luccus brought with him is thrown aside as Protis prepares him. Feeling the bigger male sheathed inside him has Luccus whining lewdly, but his voice is quickly drowned out by music as Protis fumbles the remote for the sound system the older male has installed in his bedroom. When Protis starts thrusting in time with the beat, Luccus’ vision whites out, and for the first time ever he comes more than once. Only when he recovers, panting side by side with his lover, does Luccus realize that the song Protis used is the one he’s been struggling to learn. He threatens to kick Protis out of his own bed, but the older male just laughs and quips a “You’ll see.”, wrapping an arm around Luccus’ waist.

At their group drum practice the following night, Luccus nails his part on the first try, and the second they’re alone, he pounces on his mate.


	6. Until We Weren't

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An explanation for Caelan's decision in Chapter 5 (titled Breakaway) of "You Do What You Have To For Family"

Caelan is thirteen, nearly an adult by turian standards, and he is far from stupid. He knows something has been going on between his parents for months now. His mother’s been spending more time away from home at the headquarters for her work, a weapons research and development facility near Cipritine, and his father insists including an unfamiliar female named Aclea, his “friend”, into their family life more often than Caelan is comfortable with.

When his parents sit him down alongside his sister Mena, he’s relieved, thinking they’ll explain why life has been a bit strange recently and that things will go back to normal. That is, until they break the news.

“You know we both love you,” his mother Liviana begins, making clear eye contact with both Caelan and his younger sister.

“And that will never change.” Caelan’s father adds, “But sometimes with adults we find out that we want different things, away from our bondmates.”

“Or our feelings change, and we fall out of love, even if we still care for one another.” Liviana says quietly, “Sometimes we have to make hard choices, even if in the end it’s better for everyone.”

“So,” Indari spares a quick glance at his ex-bondmate, “your mother and I had applied for dissolution of our bond. It was granted yesterday.”

“Your father and I were good together, until we weren’t, but we’re still friends. The best thing that came out of our bond was the two of you, our shining stars.” His mother smiles fondly before continuing, “We’ve decided that you both will stay here with your father and I will move to Cipritine. My company will be busy with testing our new products so I need to be closer to work.”

The responses from the siblings couldn’t be more different. Mena cries, but eventually calms with assurances from their parents, and she’s filled with questions as Liviana prepares to take her leave from the Aetrius household. Caelan’s response is a cold, withdrawn fury, choosing to forget that his father even exists, because he knows that at the root of it all is _her_. Aclea, his father’s new mate.

\---

It’s barely three weeks later, his mother has moved out and Aclea has moved in. Caelan’s quietly packing a duffle bag with his essentials when the creak of the bedroom door startles him. In the dim moonlight stands Mena, seven years his junior.

“You’re supposed to be asleep silly,” Caelan whispers, scooping his sister into his arms.

“What are you doing?” Mena hisses, having spotted his half-packed bag.

Caelan can’t lie to his sister. He _won’t_ lie to her.

“I’m going to stay with _ima_. Palaven Command is located in Cipritine and I have to go there for basic training when I’m fifteen anyways.”

“But why!”, Mena keens and Caelan has to hush her, “Why can’t you and _ima_ stay here with _abba_ and Aclea too? I think she’s nice.”

“Things don’t always work like that Mena. I know it’s hard to figure out now, but when you’re older like me you’ll understand more.”

“But who will play battle ships with me?” she pouts.

As much as it pains him to say what he’s about to, Caelan has to put on a strong face for his little sister.

“She and father can have younglings together, so then you can be a big sister and teach them how to play battle ships with you.” He knows that his father always wished for a large family after growing up as an only child, but after struggling to become pregnant with Mena, the doctors told Liviana not to expect to ever carry children again. It’s only logical that his father will want to expand his family with Aclea, loathe as Caelan is to think that he could be related to those children.

“But you’ll be gone away, and I won’t see you ever.” Mena is close to keening again, and Caelan has to do some damage control quickly, lest his father hear them in the hall as he carries Mena to her room.

“I can’t not go to basic, but I won’t be away forever. You can still come visit _ima_ and I, and I’ll come visit you too.”  He butts his head to his sisters, tucking her back into bed.

“You promise?” Mena is solemn as he pulls back.

“I promise.” Calean replied softly.

“ ’kay.”, his sister is getting sleepy now, yawning widely, “Bye Caelan.”

“Bye Mena.” his throat constricts as he closes her bedroom door, “I’ll see you soon.”

 

Heading out into the night, Caelan spared a single glance back to the home he was born and raised in for the last thirteen years. He leaves not knowing that it would be after the birth of his nephew Deican well over a decade later when he would cross the threshold of the Aetrius _doma_ again, feeling as though he’s a stranger and only staying two sleepless nights.

Walking towards the transport station, the sun just barely beginning to lighten the sky, Caelan makes two vows to himself: when he ever has a mate and family of his own, he will do everything in his power to keep them together, as long as they are loyal to each other. Secondly, if he ever finds himself between two divorced mates, he’d gladly step out of the picture so the two can reconcile and shield their children from the bitter feelings of shame, anger and grief churning in his own gut.


	7. Find You

The Citadel’s in chaos, so many refugees and wounded arriving by the day and most people are panicking. Earth is under attack, Palaven is burning and it’s only a matter of time before Thessia, Sur’Kesh and Tuchanka are in the Reapers’ sights.

Everyone is looking for a way to find some shred of hope in one of the galaxy’s darkest times, and that’s exactly what Maxis is trying to do, not only for himself, but for Lara too, as they bask in the afterglow of their coupling. What’s keeping his spirit from flagging is the hope that somewhere out there his parents are alright, and having his mate by his side. They could weather this war together, but could they manage if they’re apart?

That’s a sobering thought, and with the news he got today, their separation will happen sooner, much sooner rather than later.

“Lara, my notification came in today. I’m heading back to Artimec.”

 “Damn Reapers.” Lara cursed softly, burrowing closer into his side. Maxis knows she understands, given the course of their relationship over the years with him piloting ships and one-man fighter craft from one end of the galaxy to the other when he was still in the military.

They’ve been spoiled the last two years, having Maxis remain in one place when he transferred to the Citadel Fleet. But, as he explained to Lara when he moved permanently to the Citadel, when turians leave active duty to serve in other ways they are still reservists and can be called back to combat at their previously held rank at any time. Even after they age out, most turians would still serve in support roles during wartime.

“I don’t want you to stay here Lara, I don’t think the Citadel will be safe for long.” Maxis raised himself above her, propping up on an elbow.

“I could go to Sanctuary. Tanea D’Saris, my old roommate, and her two daughters went because Verius is being posted to Palaven. I think she said he was going to be building emergency outposts.” Lara looked hopeful, but Maxis shook his head. Word around the docks had been that Cerberus had moved into Sanctuary, and Maxis didn’t want to risk it being true.

“I had something else in mind. There’s a liveship: some forward thinking people planned ahead and actually listened to Commander Shepard, rather than those spineless bastards on the council. The ship has mostly asari, but there are turians and salarians going too. I want you on it.”

“How’d you manage to find that out?”

“I know a guy who knows a guy…anyways, I got you a seat on the liveship, but it leaves tonight.”

“What about you?”

Maxis sighed, “We ship out tomorrow. We’ve been ordered to Tuchanka. The _Defender_ is rendezvousing here, then they’ll drop us somewhere in the krogan DMZ.”

“You’re going to the krogan homeworld? Really?” Disbelief was written across Lara’s face.

“I know…” Maxis can scarcely believe it himself, and he doesn’t even know why they’re headed there.

\---

On their ride to the docks where the _Stellar_ awaits to load the last of its passengers aboard, Lara and Maxis are both quiet, sitting hand in hand and providing the support each other needs.

While Lara grabs her bag, Maxis confirms with the pilot that she’s on the manifest and he transfers the required credits over to the short asari. Its taken almost all of his savings to do this, but he’d rather be completely broke and living in the ducts than to not know that Lara is safe while he heads out to face the war.

Standing by the airlock, Lara is somber, and Maxis can tell she having a hard time keeping herself composed, her lips trembling as they say their goodbyes.

“When this is over, I’ll come find you.”

“Not if I find you first.” He quipped playfully, pushing the words past the tightness in his throat to finally get a smile from Lara.

“Ass.”, she scoffed at him, her mood lightening for the moment.

“Not ass – Maxis, remember? Your mate?”, that earns him a laugh that sounds suspiciously like a sob but he didn’t dwell on it any longer when Lara pressed her lips to his mouthplates, whispering, “My mate. Be safe out there.”

\---

The sky above Tuchanka is an odd shade of toxic green, hazed over with the dust devils kicked up by the winds on the desolate planet as Artimec descended from the _Defender_ ‘s carrier deck above the krogan homeworld.

Taking point with his fighter, Maxis transmitted their flight path to the other pilots in the airstrike squadron. “Coordinates to the Shroud facility are 143X 09A 4457K.” Through his headset, the voices of the other pilots confirm the coordinates.

Thumbing the comm to the frequency given to him by Advisor Vakarian, Maxis spoke, “Krogan ground convoy, this is turian Wing Artimec. Our flight vector to the Shroud is locked. We are ten minutes out and counting.”

The Commander’s voice is clear as she replied. “Copy that Artimec. We’re on our way, trying to make up for lost time. Shepard out.”

 

Maxis could feel himself enter the ‘zone’, as he called it, a clear headed self-awareness as he mentally prepared for what they were about to do: stare a Reaper in the eye.

“Spirits, how do the krogan live here?”, Airman Grixos asked over the comm as they flew towards the Shroud facility on the horizon.

“Come back for a vacation after the war and ask someone.” Maxis half-heartedly reprimanded their youngest pilot, “Eyes up kid, stay on my wing. We’re on final approach.”

The comm suddenly crackled, “Turian Wing Artimec, this is Shepard. We’ve been delayed, hold off your attack!”

Cursing, Maxis replied, “Negative Commander. Our approach is locked. It already knows we’re here.”

Below them, Maxis could see that the krogan ground convoy was halted, unable to traverse the damaged section of road leading to the Shroud.

The Reapers red, glowing eye powered up, and Maxis shouted for them to engage as they dove in and around the Reaper, guns firing on full auto as they tried to flank the behemoth from all sides.

The Reaper weapon fired, coming dangerously close to his craft. Behind him, the young Airman who’d followed his wing wasn’t so lucky.

_“I’ve lost control! I can’t pull up!”_

“Dammit, Grixos is hit!” Maxis snarled, as the younger pilot spiraled, losing altitude, alarms beeping across the comms. The connection cut when Grixos’ fighter slammed into one of the krogan tomkahs, erupting into a fireball.

“It’s no good. No good.” Maxis shook his head, re-centering himself. He would have to grieve the loss of the talented ‘kid’ he’d mentored just before leaving Artimec later. “Head for the pickup site.” he instructed the remaining fighters as they disengaged from the Reaper.

“Artimec do you copy?” Commander Shepard’s voice came across the comms.

“We have to abort Commander. That Reaper’s tearing us to pieces.”

“Understood. Save your pilots, we’ll find another way.”

 

Maxis cut the call, switching frequencies to contact the _Defender’s_ captain.

“Captain Camso, sir, Artimec is returning, enroute now. ETA 6 minutes. We’ve had losses down here.”

“Hold one…Flight Lieutenant, I’ve got Primarch Victus on the line, patching him through to you now.”

“Listen carefully Lieutenant,” the stately voice of the newly appointed Primarch flooded Maxis’ aural canal, “What I’m about to tell you is classified to the highest level. Commander Shepard is delivering a genophage cure in exchange for krogan support on Palaven. You and your men need to turn around and provide air support for her ground team, _now_. The krogan might just turn the tide for us.”

Maxis couldn’t believe what he was hearing. _Turning to the krogan? That didn’t sound like a good idea…_ but he didn’t question the order.

“Prepared to die for the cause sir!”

“Good Lieutenant.” With that, the Primarch was gone.

 

“Artimec, we’ve been ordered to re-engage.” Maxis instructed the remaining pilots.

“What the hell sir!?” came some indignant replies.

“Listen up boys. If we do our jobs today, we not only will be part of history, but we will have helped turn the tide for Palaven. And you know what I think? I say we show that Reaper the might of the Hierarchy: FOR PALAVEN!” Maxis roared, his sentiments echoed back to him as the other pilots rallied together for another push, thrusters set to the maximum as they screamed through the skies like banshees back to the Shroud.

Slowing his velocity as the silver tower and the dull black glint of the Reaper came into view again, Maxis connected to Shepard’s comm again.

“Commander this is Artimec Wing. We’ll try to give that Reaper something else to shoot at.”

It was another dance with the devil, but with rage fueling them, Artimec managed to distract the Reaper, flanking and firing from all sides.

Maxis fired before his attention was grabbed by the ground radar display, which showed something _big_ was coming, and fast.

Checking below him, Maxis could see Shepard’s team retreating as the Reaper’s horn blared and it began to move, a leviathan lurching across the wasteland.

“Artimec! Pull back!” Vakarian’s voice was on the comm now.

After a moment, Maxis saw why.

“Holy fucking spirits…that thresher maw is taking on the Reaper!”

\---

Voices elated after the destruction of the Reaper, knowing that for every bullet they fired there’s a chance that their mates, families and friends might be spared, Maxis and his squadron returned to the _Defender_. The Captain greeted the returning airmen on the carrier deck, bringing thanks from a grateful Primarch.

Pulling Maxis aside, their XO informed him that that Artimec was off duty until they arrive at their next destination.

He’s helped his people, now it’s time to help hers.

They’re headed to Earth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lara's roommate is the Asari in ME3 who you can overhear having a conversation with her turian husband on the Citadel (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QyjM3JAonlw). Maxis is based on the pilot who leads Artimec Wing on Tuchanka to provide an airstrike against the Reaper guarding the Shroud (these guys had to have balls of steel!).


	8. Talk to Me

Caelan and Lara both had the day off and he’d decided to take her out for a nice dinner, just the two of them, to her favorite restaurant. She’s been stressed, studying at all hours in preparation for her licencing exam and now she’s been waiting for the results to come back, and it’s had her on edge. He figured it would be the best way to keep her mind off things, if only for a little while.

He hadn’t meant to upset her.

They’re just finishing their shared dessert, some exorbitantly priced dual-amino faux chocolate concoction, when a couple at the next table over erupted into cries of joy as the brunette woman cradled the barely-there baby bump of her red-headed wife’s abdomen in her hands.

Caelan eyed the red-head after the two women separated to receive congratulations from the rest of their party, and he tried to imagine what Lara would look like. The image came to him easily: Lara heavy and swollen with child yet glowing as pregnant women of all species do, Caius excited and chattering on about human babies, and himself so full of love for this new life that will be part of her and yet his as well, regardless of genetics and species, that he could burst.

Caelan could feel the beginnings of a thrum of desire well up in him as he glanced at Lara, who smiled in the direction of the other table before fixing her gaze on their dessert. He assumed that she might be thinking along the same lines as he is, but if their discussion later is anything to go by, he couldn’t be more wrong.

Lara was quiet on their ride home, and remained that way even as she thanked and paid Neelia for staying with Caius. It’s when they’re alone that he decided to broach the topic that’s been on his mind since they’ve returned from Palaven.

“Lara, you remember what Caius said our first night on Palaven, about having a sibling?” Caelan paused hesitantly as he settled into bed beside her, “Do you ever think about us having children together?”

“I don’t think a hurian or a tuman is in the cards.” she tried to deflect and Caelan caught it, shaking his head.

“Not what I meant.”

Lara sighed next to him, “Honestly, I have too. Another turian would be pretty cute, and we know Caius would be all for it.”

“What about human child? It wouldn’t have to be turian.”, Lara was silent so he pushed ahead, “Like that other couple at the restaurant tonight. I’d love to see what you look like carrying a child, our child, with your eyes or your hair or your smile.”

Her response is the last thing he expected. Lara rolled away from him with a firm “No.”, and faced the holo-clock on the bedside table instead, curling in on herself and hugging her legs to her chest.

“What do you mean?” Caelan asked softly, trying to touch her comfortingly which only caused Lara to curl into an even smaller ball.

Lara took a shuddering breath, “Don’t – don’t touch me right now.”

Caelan couldn’t help the pang of hurt that struck him and he felt as though they were light years apart, even though they were only separated by inches between the sheets. His mate was obviously in pain and refusing his comfort, and Caelan felt a suffocating kind of guilt for causing it.

“Please,” Caelan whispered, pleading as he curled himself around her, pressing his brow to her neck, “tell me what’s wrong so I can fix it. You said that if we were going to be mates we needed to talk the hard things out, together. I’ve been trying, but I need you to talk to me too. _Amora_ , just talk to me.”

“Can’t be fixed.” Lara’s reply was muffled, “Never used to bother me, and it damn well shouldn’t be now after all these years.”

“Tell me Lara, help me understand what you’re feeling.”

Uncurling and twisting to face him. Lara’s eyes were glassy, her voice barely a whisper “I’m afraid that I’ll scare you away.”

Caelan felt an unbearable pain weave through him, and he couldn’t imagine what Lara must be feeling to speak a thought like that. “I’m in this for the long haul, remember? I’m not going anywhere unless you want me to.” he murmured, brushing a stand of stray hair out of her face.

“Might change your mind.” Lara sighed, “You know that I don’t look a lot like other human women, right? I’m taller, broader, bigger boned and more androgynous looking, and you must have noticed my ‘lady bits’ are a little larger than what’s considered normal.”

Caelan had to think for a minute. He never really bothered to study other human females - Lara was the one he was attracted to, not them. Sexually Lara was his first (and only) human, even though the asari commando he had been with for a few months was somewhat similar in regards to the anatomy of their ‘lady bits’. But Caelan realized that he really had nothing to compare her to.

“I was diagnosed with Swyer’s Syndrome when I was sixteen. A normal human woman carries two X chromosomes, while males carry XY.”

Caelan nodded. Turian’s were basically the same, although it was the females that carried two different chromosomes, rather than the males.

“For someone like me, externally I look female but I carry XY chromosomes like a male, and they influence the shape and look of my body. My ‘ovaries’ had to be removed because they were non-functional. I have to get a hormone implant every year from the doctor that provides my body with the estrogen and progesterone it needs, and even though I have a period, my uterus is underdeveloped and couldn’t house a pregnancy.”

“So you can’t-? Spirits I’m such a fool…”

“It’s not your fault Caelan. I’ve known this for a long time, but I’ve never had to tell anyone about it. I never actually wanted to give birth to children of my own anyways; adoption always seemed more appealing to me. But then-“

“I had to go and bring it up.” Caelan bowed his head, closing his eyes.

“You couldn’t have known, especially when I didn’t tell you.” Lara stroked his mandible, “It’s a nice dream, but one that won’t come true for us because of me; and I’d understand if this is a deal-breaker for you.”

“Never.” Caelan reaffirmed, wrapping himself around her, “But Lara, I think you’re forgetting a lesson from your _Turian 101_ class.” he tried to lighten the mood, referring to a time earlier in their relationship where he had teased Lara about studying Fornax’s _Tantalizing Turians: The Might of the Hierarchy_ issue as part of her xenoanatomy class.

“Turian females carry two differing chromosomes too. But I think you’re more like an asari.”

“Huh?”

“It’s simple. Asari are monogendered but there are some who prefer to be referred to as male or female, whereas other asari are fluid in between the two sexes.”

Lara laid there in stunned silence and Caelan continued, trying to show his mate how much she meant to him.

“You are a strong female, a loving mother, an intelligent student, a listening ear, and most importantly MY mate. There is no one else out there who could compare, and nothing can change that, least of all what chromosomes you carry inside.

If you want to adopt a human child someday, we will. If it’s another turian fledgling you’re after, I’ll look up adoption coordinators on the extranet. I would be proud to move to Omega and raise a pack of vorcha if you wanted…well, that might be pushing it just a bit.”

“That would be pushing it a lot…” Lara chuckled lowly before quieting, “but I wouldn’t mind contacting an adoption coordinator though, to see about getting us on the list for a little turian who needs a family?” Her blue-gray eyes are hopeful, and Caelan breathed an internal sigh of relief.

“One who needs a big brother too.” Caelan pressed his brow to her own, trailing his fingers through her hair. “Better now that we’ve talked?”

“Mhm.” Lara nodded, her eyelids growing heavy.

“You know, I think that might just be the first time _ever_ in the history of the galaxy where a woman was compared to an asari and felt good about it.”, she said dryly, burrowing down into the covers.

Caelan just chuffed and turned out the light.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had debated on posting this chapter but decided to go with it as Lara's diagnosis is based on my own, and writing her story has helped me to start dealing with negative emotions I've had surrounding my body.


	9. Chocolate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! I finally had a chance to sit down and write something after a busy couple weeks of clinical intersession (still one week left before I head out for my second one!). Hope you enjoy :D

Wandering into the ‘Confection Connection’ in Thessia’s capital, Lara marveled at how a turian run dextro-specialty shop was modeled after old-school candy and chocolatier shops from human vids. Bright pastels colored the walls, contrasting with the black and white checkerboard floor and a candy-cane striped counter and matching stools. The whole place smelled like heaven, dark notes of dextro cocoa mingled with sweet mint and savory caramel scents, with a whiff of something like licorice for good measure.

The shop had been recommended to her by her roommate, Tanea’s, boyfriend Verius, who had been staying over at their flat while he was on shore-leave, bringing a box of dextro _dulcis_ , a chocolate covered candy, along with a box of assorted levo candies for the two girls.

Knowing that she wasn’t allergic to dextro proteins, a requirement for her xenobiology degree, Lara had discovered that you couldn’t eat just one piece of _dulcis_. The little candies were addicting, an assortment of different flavors hidden under the dark, bitter glaze of dextro chocolate. You never knew which flavor you would bite into next – whether it was the sweetness of _plyian_ , akin to human caramels, or the lip-puckering flavor of over-ripe _iquva_ fruit, which was sour enough to make Lara’s eyes water and her jaw ache. The trio had spent hours drinking wine and guessing which flavor they would get next and they had eaten the entire box in one sitting.

Now Lara waited in line to place her order, enjoying the ambiance of the shop. The brass bell on the door rang behind her, and Lara turned to see a tall male with minimalistic blue clan markings sported on plates the color of milk chocolate. She smiled politely at him when he made eye contact, and she returned her attention to the line up in front of her.

In her periphery, she watched the male walk over to the shelves with pre-packaged sweets, noting the insignia on his armor denoting that he was a pilot, until the elderly clerk behind the counter cleared her throat. Mandibles flaring in a smile the _torvi_ greeted Lara. “Welcome to Confection Connections! What were you looking for today? It’s not often we have a human in our shop.”

Lara smiled, ignoring the subtle, if seemingly innocent, dig about her being human. “I was told that your shop was the best place for _dulcis_ and I was hoping to purchase some.”

“Can I ask who recommended us to you?” The clerk leaned forward conspiratorially, her elbows resting on the counter.

“Verius Thanopsis.”

“Oh Verius! One of our most loyal customers. He always stops by to purchase something sweet for Tanea.”

“Yes I know. Tanea is my roommate.”

“Ah well, a friend of Verius’ deserves a discount!” The clerk grinned as she began to measure out and weigh the amount of _dulcis_ and a few other confections Lara had requested. Transferring over the required amount of credits, Lara thanked the clerk and walked over to a small side table and sat her purchases on it as she eagerly opened the bag containing the _dulcis._

Luckily, the first piece she had picked out was her favorite. The creamy vanilla flavored center spread across her tongue and Lara had to stop herself from moaning contentedly. Popping a second piece in her mouth, Lara rested it between her tongue and palate, sucking the chocolate off of the hard candy underneath when a sharp whack to her back took her breath away. The bonbon flew from her mouth onto the floor to mingle with the others that scattered from her dropped bag.

“Spit it out! Naïve human, your can die from anaphylaxis!” The deep voice ordered. Lara was prevented from making any sort of reply when the male hoisted her not insubstantial weight over his shoulder, carrying her out of the Confection Connection with a hand on her ass to hold her in place. Finally getting her bearings, Lara craned her neck to catch a glimpse of chocolate colored plates.

“Hey you asshole!” Lara thumped her fists on his cowl, cursing at the pain that reverberated up her arms from hitting a turian in full armor. The bastard probably didn’t even feel it. He ignored her, his attention focused elsewhere.

“You there! Hierarchy business, I’m commandeering your shuttle. I will return it to you as soon as possible.” The turian male unceremoniously dumped Lara in the back seat of a skycar before clambering into the drivers seat himself, cursing about the lack of power of the “damned GX model”. He pried open a panel and crossed a few wires before the skycar was careening upwards, the acceleration pinning Lara into her seat, but not before she noticed the shocked stares of a family of salarians, two adults and three younglings.

Finally able to sit up after the skycar levelled off, Lara glared at the _torvir_ in the front seat. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

“Getting you to the nearest hospital before your throat swells up and you die. Crazy old-“ Lara’s translator garbled on the next string of words out of his mouth. They were curses of some sort she assumed. “should have known better than to sell turian products to a human.”

“Does it look like I’m allergic to dextro you idiot?! No swollen throat, no hives, no heaving or vomiting.” Lara gestured to her face and throat. “That’s why I knew I could buy the _dulcis_ which YOU made me spill all over the floor!”

“And how would you know that?” The male grumbled, putting the skycar into a terrifying nose-dive, skidding to a stop atop a hospital landing pad.

Lara pinched her nose in irritation. “I’m studying xenoscience at the D’Linarev Institute and I had to test negative to any allergies when I was offered a seat.”

“Don’t care. We’ll get the docs to look at ya, just to be safe.” The male went to make a grab for her and Lara darted past his outstretched talons. “Oh no you don’t!” she snarled, squaring up to him. “I will NOT be carried again! If you want me to see a doctor I will WALK like a civilized person!”

She could see the torvir’s teeth gnash and mandibles flick in irritation before he conceded.

“Fine. If you drop dead, that’s on you. Stubborn woman…”

\---

Maxis paced agitatedly in the waiting area. He hoped that his quick actions had prevented the woman from the 'Confection Connection' from having any adverse effects to eating dextro candies. Aside from his primary concern, his head was filled with half-lewed thoughts of the feeling of his hand on her bottom as he had carried her over his shoulder. He had always been attracted to the ‘softer’ species, dating asari almost exclusively and he had been tempted to try a human for some time now. Her ass wasn’t overly firm, like some of the extremely fit commandos he'd been with, nor was it exceptionally soft. It was somewhere in between, and Maxis wanted to feel it again, cupping it with both hands

He snorted in amusement now, thinking back to her tenacity; the minute vibration of her pummeling fists through his armor, and her insistence at walking into the hospital, darting past his grip and ready to take him head on if he tried to carry her. Someday, Maxis thought, he might like to re-enact that scene again and see if he could catch her; ideally with him tossing her down onto a bed and having his way with her at the end of their play-fighting.

The intake nurse who had taken the female to be checked over finally returned, and Maxis cornered her behind the duty station.

“Is she ok? The human female I brought in?”

The diminutive asari frowned disapprovingly at him. “Miss Wells is completely fine and shows no evidence of dextro allergy, as she has pointed out multiple times. Against my recommendations, Lara has chosen not to press any charges against you, and she has given permission for you to see her before she is discharged.”

Maxis let his subvocals ring out in relief that she was alright. The nurse gave him directions to Lara’s room and as he walked, he passed by the hospital gift shop, where, to his surprise, a box of _dulcis_ sat on one of the shelves. He made a quick detour and made his purchase, brandishing the box in front of him as a shield when he entered Lara’s room.

“Are you happy now?” Lara, clad in a thin spotted hospital gown that showed off her unmarked shoulders nicely, said sarcastically. She waved a hand, bruised on the back from where an IV had been placed and removed, to encompass the room and the various medical equipment in it. “No signs of dextro allergies, confirmed by two different doctors.”

Maxis stuttered out a broken, embarrassed apology, quickly handing over the box of _dulcis_ as he made his leave.

“Hey," her voice was quiet and gave him pause, turning to face her in the doorway, taking in her blue-gray eyes that were studying his form. “thanks for being worried about me." A delicate blush settled over her cheeks. "You know, this is a pretty big box. Want to help me eat some of them while I wait?” Lara asked, peeking at him shyly.

“Sure.” He rumbled in surprise, half expecting the hospital security arrive to remove him from her room as he sat beside Lara on the bed. He reached for the box only to have it snatched away from him. Instead, Lara was holding a piece out to him, pinched between her thumb and forefinger. He went to take it from her, which made her pull her hand back, and Maxis frowned in confusion.

“Not like that.” She brought the chocolate closer to his mouth. _Now_ Maxis understood what she wanted. Tentatively, his mouth-plates parted, blue tongue snaking out to take the chocolate, and he gently laved her fingertips as he did so. He held the bonbon in his mouth, allowing the chocolate to melt slowly off the underlying candy.

“There’s an old human vid that said ‘life is like a box of chocolates’.” She paused, and Maxis bit down on the candy, face contorting as he spat and sputtered when the sour taste of _iquva_ flooded his tongue. Lara smirked triumphantly at him as she continued.

“‘you never know what you’re gonna get.’”


	10. Message Undeliverable

Although Maxis had only been gone on his training exercises for two and a half days, and wouldn’t be back until the start of the following week, Caius couldn’t stop looking for him. Everywhere. The grocery store, the clothing store, and C-SEC (where Lara had gone to pay a fine) were all potential options where Maxis could be hiding from Caius. 

Even now, after a full morning of errands and a cozy lunch at a family-friendly restaurant where Caius had spent more time bouncing around with the other young turian children than eating, he hadn’t stopped looking for Max.

“Ba?” Caius popped his head over the back of the sofa where they sat watching a vid, peering hopefully at the closed apartment door, having heard the sounds of the heating unit repairman across the hall.

“ _Ab ba_. Remember, it’s _abba_ not ba.”

“Ahhh-Ba?” Caius looked back at her for confirmation he’d said it right.

“That’s it Cai!” she cheered.

“Ba!” Caius giggled cheekily before a jaw-splitting yawn overtook his face, and he slumped down onto the couch cushions.

Lara shook her head in amusement. Small victories.

“I think it’s time for someone to have a nap.”

“No no no.” Caius shook his head, determined to stave off the _dreaded_ nap time.

“Yes yes yes.” Lara replied, scooping her three-year-old son up as he tried to dart past her.

“No’ tired.” Caius whined even as he snuggled into her arms.

Lara snorted. Children of all species were the same when it came to naptime.

Tucking Caius under a fleecy blue Blasto blanket and giving him his teddy bear to hold, Lara quietly exited the room, turning to smile softly at her son whose mandibles fluttered in a dreamless sleep. She snapped a quick holo with her omni-tool and sent it off to Maxis with a short message.

 

_< **From:** Lwells4@citadel.gov_

**_To:_ ** _ lt.faionm@THVDecilia.thv_

**_Subject:_ ** _Sleepy son_

**_Attachments:_ ** _holophoto2_

_Max,_

_I know you won’t see this until exercises are over but I wanted to give you something to read on your ride back to the Citadel. Someone got pretty tuckered out looking for his ‘ba’ all morning (he still won’t say abba even though he knows it, the cheeky bugger). Hope training is going well and we can’t wait until you’re back._

_Love you! >_

 

An automatic reply came back almost instantly, notifying her that Maxis would be out of range for training and Lara deleted it, already knowing what it said.

_< User  lt.faionm@THVDecilia.thv is out of range at this time for training. If you need to contact this individual for emergency purposes, contact Major Hortennius at mjr.hortenniusj@THVKratian.thv >_

 

Despite all of the things she should do around the apartment, Lara thought a nap for herself didn’t sound too bad. Sprawling on the couch, Lara situated the pillows under her head, and soon she was asleep.

\---

“Ima! IMA!” The shrill scream of her son startled Lara from her sleep, and she raced to his room, her heart pounding in her chest. Bursting in, the room was awash in a biotic blue blaze, all emanating from Caius’ hands and body. His eyes were wide and panicked, and a terrified keen came from his throat as Caius tried to escape the energy that clung to him, a cobalt spectre trailing around the room behind him.

“IMA!” Caius cried again helplessly, racing for her. Lara gathered him in her arms and attempted to soothe him, ignoring the burn in her muscles and veins, and the tightness of her chest from the biotics emitted by her petrified son. Sweat began to bead on her brow and Lara’s endurance was beginning to wane when, like a candle being blown out, his biotics sapped.

Lara felt as though she’d run a marathon. Her breath came in heaving pants and her arms trembled with overexertion. That was nothing compared to Caius, who shuddered and shook, completely terrified with the most heartbreaking, hiccupping keens coming from him.

“Caius?” Lara tilted his head from where he’d buried it in her shoulder. He still had a frightened expression on his face, and her eyes burned with tears. “Oh baby. It’s okay now, it’s ok.” She repeated over and over, rocking him back and forth, unsure if she was really trying to soothe Caius or herself. More likely, she reasoned, it was both.

Eventually, Caius’ shudders tempered down to occasional shivers, as if he was just cold, and Lara decided that a visit to the med-clinic was in order.

“Caius, we have to go see Dr. Gratrian, ok? You can bring Felix too.” Caius nodded, his expression brightening a minuscule degree at the mention of his bear. Lara went to set him down, but Caius clung to her neck. His voice was muffled. “…scared ima. You make it go away? If the blue come back?”

“I promise.” Lara kissed his temple and rubbed his back reassuringly. That seemed to pacify Caius for the time being, and she lowered him to the floor, where Caius took one shaky step from her before collapsing.

When Caius had very first begun walking, Lara and Maxis had both been concerned about his stilted gait, more awkward and unbalanced than normally expected for a child just learning to walk. The doctor had assured them it was likely nothing that he couldn’t grow out of, that it was probably just one leg being shorter than the other, and as Caius grew that seemed to be the case.

“You ok there _adva?_ ” Lara bent to help him stand, only to have his legs give out again.

“Feels funny ima.” Caius keened, on the verge of panicking again.

“It’s alright, Dr. Gratrian will make it feel better, okay?” Lara picked Caius up, carrying him to the table and sitting him in a chair with his bear. “Wait here for ima, ok? After we go see Dr. Gratrian we’ll get you a _glacies_ treat.” Caius stayed put, allowing Lara to grab what she needed to bring to the doctor’s with them.

She took a quick moment to send off a voice-to-text message to Maxis as well as Major Hortennius before scooping Caius up and quickly leaving the apartment.

_< **From:** Lwells4@citadel.gov_

**_To:_ ** _ lt.faionm@THVDecilia.thv; mjr.hortenniusj@THVKratian.thv_

**_Subject:_ ** _Caius EMERGENCY_

_Max,_

_Caius had a biotic episode? I guess I’d call it that. Was laying down and resting. Then he woke up terrified and screaming. After his episode he went to walk and couldn’t. Collapsed. Headed to dr now. Please call ASAP. >_

She ignored the ping of an automatic reply.

\---

Hours of doctors poking and prodding, running test after test had exhausted both Lara and Caius. His _glacies_ treat melted into a sticky mess on the back of her shirt after he’d fallen asleep as she held him through the elevator ride to their floor. Phrases like _‘rare, only a few other cases’, ‘neoplastic overgrowth of biotic nodules’,_ ‘ _compromised mobility’, ‘neuromuscular degeneration’_ and _‘prognosis unknown’_ swam in her mind as she turned the corner to their apartment. By the door stood two turians, a male and a female, both clad in black robes with deep, royal blue sashes and hoods. The color of turian blood.

“Can I help you?” Lara called, shifting Caius to her other hip.

“Lara Wells?” The female asked and Lara nodded.

“What is this about?” Lara questioned, unsure why these two strangers decided to show up at her door. She had half a mind to send them away so she and Caius could rest, but their uniforms looked official, and she caught a look at some sort of Hierarchy insignia on the shoulder.

“Could we talk inside ma’am?” The male spoke. Lara nodded blearily and sighed.

“Let me put my son to bed first. It’s been a long day.”

Lara opened the door and gestured for the two to take a seat at the table. She tucked an exhausted Caius into bed, changing him into his most comfortable sleepwear and praying that he’d get some rest.

She returned to the front of the apartment and took a seat at the table across from the two Hierarchy officers.

“What is this about?” Lara asked, hoping that whatever it was would be quick or could be handled another day.

The two officers exchanged looks before the female spoke.

“We are Casualty Assistance Officers Laenion and Batis,” she gestured to the male on her left, “and we regret to inform you that Flight Lieutenant Maxis Faion was declared killed-in-flight-accident at 0200 local time on the planet of Invictus, in the Minos Wasteland of the Caestus System. You are listed on his file as an emergency contact. At this time, no remains are able to be recovered.”

Lara was…she didn’t know what she was. Shocked? Upset? Angry?

“That-“ she paused, the weight of the situation finally hitting her. “that can’t be true.” Her voice broke. “I just sent him messages earlier today. It can’t be true.”

“If you check your inbox ma’am, you would have received a notification.”

With shaking fingers, Lara navigated through her omni-tool, bringing up her messages. There were two new messages. She opened the first.

< **_From:_** _Mail Delivery System_ Mailer-Daemon@THVDecilia.thv;  Mailer-Daemon@THVKratian.thv  
**To:**  Lwells4@citadel.gov  
**Subject:**  Mail delivery failed

_This message was created automatically by mail delivery software._  
A message you sent cannot be delivered to its recipient(s). This is a permanent error.  
Subject: Caius EMERGENCY

_The following address(es) failed:_

_ lt.faionm@THVDecilia.thv _ _; mjr.hortenniusj@THVKratian.thv  
No Such User(s) Exist Here_

With tears blurring her vision, she opened the second, and a pre-recorded message from the Primarch began to play.

“It is with deepest regrets and sincere sadness that the Turian Hierarchy must inform you of the loss of Lt. Maxis Faion. Lt. Faion’s sacrifice will be honored by all who serve the Hierarchy both at home and galactically abroad. Casualty assistance officers have been dispatched and will assist with any arrangements to be made. Thank you, and your loved ones, for their service.”

Lara completely broke.

\---

In his room, Caius whimpered and shook under the blankets. He’d had a bad dream about the blue. The blue that made his mouth taste funny and burned. He went to call out for his ima, but he heard a noise. Ima was crying? He had hurt his ima, with the blue, and now she was sad. Softly, Caius began to keen; he wished ba- no, _abba_ was here to make it better.


End file.
